Progrums

Virginia Tech’s 2026 recruiting class has more holes than a slice of Swiss cheese left out in a monsoon. Recruits are ghosting campus tours faster than you can say Lane Stadium, while assistants chase prospects with faded mailers and car magnets that read “Commit Now!” Former head coach Brent Pry bailed faster than a leaky rowboat, leaving interns to hustle like ballet dancers stuck in quicksand. Rumor has it the only signed commitment so far is from a kid who’ll join—if, and only if, they promise free ice cream. At this rate, the Hokies might settle for a returned postcard.