Progrums

In a move more dramatic than a daytime soap opera, the Texas Longhorns have set their sights on securing the universe’s most sought-after leftover — a five-star talent who just ghosted Clemson like last season’s lineup. Coaches are reportedly installing giant nets around Austin just in case he tries to slip through, and rumor has it the entire stadium will be renamed “Second Chance Coliseum” once the deal goes through. With scholarship offers flying faster than burnt brisket at a tailgate, the Longhorns are apparently determined to prove that one school’s decommit is another school’s touchdown dance. Talk about turning rejection into a recruiting flex.