Progrums

Athens meteorologists have finally admitted that their so-called “final weather report” for this weekend’s Georgia-Alabama showdown was really just an excuse to hype tailgaters. Sure, they scribbled down “30% chance of rain” in tiny print at the bottom, but everyone knows the real forecast is 100% chance of Bulldogs steamrolling Crimson Tide morale. Fans are encouraged to bring more foam fingers than ponchos, because the only thing pouring in Sanford Stadium will be Georgia touchdowns. Expect skies to clear the moment the first Dawg score hits—Mother Nature knows better than to mess with this level of hype.