Progrums

Rising 2026 linebacker and self-proclaimed Spartan superfan has stunned both fan bases by penciling in a whirlwind weekend tour of Ann Arbor. Despite pledging eternal loyalty to Michigan State back in June (complete with ceremonial handshake and fainting goats), the recruit has decided that destiny—and possibly the promise of free pizza—calls him north. Sources say he’s just “keeping his options open” and has already packed two comb-overs, three pairs of cleats, and a heartfelt apology in case Wolverine fans get feisty. Coaches on both sides are frantically refreshing their phones, wondering if this is a bold recruiting ploy or a high-stakes social experiment. Either way, Spartans and Wolverines alike are marking the calendar, stocking up on pom-poms, and placing bets on whether he’ll leave Ann Arbor with a signed jersey… or at least a decent souvenir magnet.