Hokies’ Pitch Drama Ends in Drenched Scoreless Draw
Virginia Tech’s women’s soccer team closed out their season on Thompson Field with a 0-0 tie against Miami. In soggy conditions brought on by heavy rain, the Hokies dominated possession early and forced multiple corners and shots, only to be repeatedly thwarted by Miami’s goalkeeper, Atlee Olofson. Key moments included a frantic five-second shooting spree from freshmen Hannah Pachan, Syri Davis, and Anna Weir, and a late penalty kick by leading scorer Natalie Mitchell that was controversially overturned because the ball never touched the keeper on the rebound. Despite solid defensive efforts, especially from keeper Lauren Hargrove in her final match, Tech finishes winless in conference play after a promising start to the season.
Fans, rejoice: after ranking No. 20 and opening with three straight wins, the Hokies spent the rest of the season perfecting their art of not scoring. Who knew that training regimens included rigorous drills in how to kick the ball directly at defenders, or gingerly nudge shots just wide of the goal? Let’s give it up for penalty dysfunction—nothing says “clutch athlete” like blasting a spot kick so far off the sweet spot it ricochets off the bar in slow motion. Silver linings? Well, the rain makes for nice photos; look at those soaked jerseys! And hey, at least the seniors end their careers with a shutout classic: 0-0 always beats 0-1, right?
Three Hokies Poised to Upset No. 16 Cardinals
Virginia Tech’s football team heads into its ninth game of the 2025 season facing No. 16 Louisville at Lane Stadium. After a 34-3 loss in their last meeting, the 3-5 Hokies are searching for three key contributors. Quarterback Kyron Drones will need to balance his rushing and passing threats to spark an offense that thrives on the ground. Running backs Terion Stewart and Marcellous Hawkins must reignite the Hokies’ powerful ground game that produced over 350 yards against California. On defense, lineman Kemari Copeland’s disruptive play and recent three-sack performance set the stage for pressure on Louisville QB Miller Moss. A win here would keep bowl hopes alive before final games against Florida State, Miami, and Virginia.
Nothing says “dynamite upset” like leaning on your ground game and praying that your quarterback doesn’t spontaneously combust under pressure. Kyron Drones, who rushed for 137 yards last week, now carries the hopes of fans who still remember what a win feels like. Meanwhile, Magyar-esque tailbacks Stewart and Hawkins must break free from Louisville’s defensive trenches, like peas trying to escape a kid’s utensil. And let’s not forget Copeland: if he can turn Miller Moss into a quivering schoolboy, we might just see fireworks. Otherwise, rumor has it the Hokies will petition the ACC to add “margin for humorous moral victories” to the standings.
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