Flopping on the Field: Third-String QBs Upstage Fickell
Wisconsin finished 4-8 despite injuries at quarterback, prompting coach Luke Fickell to cite depleted QB depth as the primary culprit. Yet at least five other FBS teams managed better records while cycling through third- or fourth-string signal-callers. Louisiana Tech went 7-5 with three different starters, the Ragin’ Cajuns hit 6-6 under their third-stringer, and Coastal Carolina also reached .500 with three QBs. Meanwhile, Wisconsin rotated through four quarterbacks—starter Billy Edwards Jr., backup Danny O’Neil, third-stringer Hunter Simmons, and true freshman Carter Smith—and still only won two of their final ten games.
It turns out blaming a revolving door of quarterbacks is the collegiate equivalent of blaming your GPS for getting lost when you’re driving off a cliff. Fickell’s “quarterbackocalypse” defense sounds like a made-for-TV disaster flick, complete with explosions on the sidelines and a cameo by Murphy’s Law. Maybe next season he can blame global warming or the alignment of Pluto for ending the Badgers’ playoff hopes. Pro tip: your third-string QB won’t magically morph into Tom Brady, but at least he won’t be the only one riding the struggle bus.
Giant Freshman Battles the Bench for Badgers’ Minutes
True freshman center Will Garlock, standing 7-1, has fought through weight gains, Big Ten physicality, and limited playing time to earn more minutes in the Wisconsin rotation. After logging 7.7 minutes across the first 11 games, he cracked 25 minutes in back-to-back wins. While hardly an offensive force—just seven shot attempts—Garlock leads reserves with 18 assists and only two turnovers. Coach Greg Gard praises his athletic “dynamite” potential and maturity, hoping he and fellow freshman Aleksas Bieliauskas can anchor UW’s defensive intensity and rim finishing in the season’s second half.
Behold the towering freshman, who already makes defenders look like toddlers and basketballs feel like Nerf toys! It’s as if someone stuck a giraffe on a treadmill and called it a college athlete. His highlight reel is less dunk-driven spectacle and more “please let me touch the court” cameo. Yet Madison’s new big man is trending toward “massive athletic human being” status—if only his foul count didn’t rival a speed-dating session. Stay tuned as Garlock tries to grow into his own hype and avoid being called “that guy who fouls everyone.”
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