Spartans Embrace Hoop Boot Camp with Brutal Preseason
Michigan State men’s basketball won’t waste a single second on warm-ups. By June 2025, Tom Izzo had locked in exhibition and non-conference contracts to face UConn in East Lansing, then Duke at the Champions Classic in Chicago, followed by showdown games against Arkansas on Thanksgiving in Detroit and Gonzaga somewhere in California. These matchups aim to harden the Spartans before Big Ten play, simulating NCAA-tournament intensity long before March.
Who needs a soft landing when you can start the season feeling like you just volunteered for military boot camp? Izzo’s visiting-list reads like a villainous PowerPoint presentation at “How to Humiliate Your Team 101.” Opponents include a Huskies squad that “politely” knocked MSU out of the Sweet 16, a Duke team fresh from a defeat that still has coach Jon Scheyer Googling “how to cry on court,” and Gonzaga, who get the privilege of playing on an aircraft carrier called “neutral court.” It’s the sporting equivalent of a Spartan-themed escape room—zero hints, only traps.
Gulker the Swiss Army TE: Blocking, Rushing, Passing?
Carson Gulker arrived from Division II Ferris State as a tight end but refuses to stay in a box. In college, he’s accounted for 73 career touchdowns—50 on the ground, 16 by air, seven by catch—and even thrown for 1,591 yards with 16 TDs. At 6-foot-3, 245 pounds, he can line up at tight end, slip into the backfield, or even take snaps under center. Nick Sheridan dreams of “positionless players,” and Gulker is the poster child for his offense’s next season.
Imagine a football team recruiting a human Transformer. Gulker’s briefcase must include a “quarterback slide tackle” and “wide-receiver stiff arm,” but don’t try to pin him down—he’ll simply morph into a fullback when you blink. Sheridan’s playbook now resembles a Jackson Pollock painting: chaotic, colorful, and only the artist knows what’s next. Opposing defenses will spend fall camp debating if “No. 7” is eligible to catch, throw, or break their ankles—spoiler: he’ll do all three, then moonwalk into the end zone just for kicks.
Returning Spartans Poised for Breakout Roles
Michigan State’s roster turnover via the transfer portal leaves opportunities for depth players to step up. Jesse McCulloch could fill a center vacancy after Jaxon Kohler and Carson Cooper graduate. Freshman Jordan Scott, having earned a starter’s spot late last season, can leverage his 6-foot-8 shooting stroke to become a go-to option. Injured transfer Kaleb Glenn, coming off a knee issue, offers much-needed wing shooting after hitting 41% from three at Florida Atlantic.
Tom Izzo has perfected the art of “one man’s benchwarmer is another man’s breakout star.” McCulloch’s biggest daily struggle? Waking up from all those midgame bench naps. Meanwhile, Scott–the team’s new skinny sharpshooter–will have to bulk up just enough so he doesn’t get confused for a traffic cone on defense. And Glenn? He’ll show up with an ACL scar as his badge of honor, armed with a 3-point rifle that might just make the Breslin Center feel like a carnival game your grandma can’t miss.
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