Rival Pollsters Spar Over Huskies’ Early Ranking
Two veteran pollsters—Phil Steele and George Wrighster—dropped their first Top 25 college football lists around the Fourth of July. Steele slotted Washington dead last at No. 25, inexplicably ranking Navy and Boise State ahead of the Huskies, while Wrighster gave UW a surprising boost to No. 13, despite crowning Oregon his No. 1 team. Steele’s list feels like a grab bag of blue-blood nods and patriotic impulses, and Wrighster’s shows just how partisan hometown pride can tilt even the most “expert” ballot.
Ah yes, the great wisdom of people who presumably have nothing better to do than shuffle names on a spreadsheet. Steele’s poll reads like someone picked teams out of a hat—and threw in Navy for good measure—while Wrighster’s has Oregon basking in glory and the Huskies getting a participation trophy bump. It’s comforting to know that college football rankings are still based on nostalgia, spilled beers, and the faint hope that someone will actually watch the games before placing them on a pedestal.
Gridiron Glutton: John Mills’ Steak Odyssey
University of Washington lineman John Mills has spent the summer sampling eight different cuts of steak at Seattle’s famed El Gaucho, pairing each rare delight with mugs of root beer. From the Top Sirloin to A5 Miyazaki Masterclass, Mills has reviewed every meaty masterpiece with witty one-liners and an appetite worthy of prime time. His culinary journey has become as reliable as DoorDash—only you know what you’re getting and you can Instagram it live.
Move over, Michelin inspectors—here comes John “The Carnivore” Mills, carving a new path through Seattle’s finest bovine specimens. Armed with a 335-pound frame and a root beer chaser, he’s transformed steak night into a football offseason ritual. One wonders if this is training for the gridiron or covert research for a Netflix cooking special: “Chop, Sizzle, Tackle.” Either way, when fall camp starts, opposing defenses will feel as tenderized as that Chateaubriand he polished off last week.
Meet TI: The 12-Syllable Defensive Tackle
Freshman DT Tufanua Ionatana Umu-Cais arrived at Washington spring football with a name that takes longer to say than an entire playbook read-through. At 6-foot-2 and 312 pounds, he’s already mixing strength with emerging footwork, earning praise from Coach Jason Kaufusi. While coaches preach agility and follow-up hits, the public-address announcer is still in bootcamp trying to pronounce all 12 syllables—so the team just calls him “TI.”
Behold the name that’s longer than some NFL careers: Tufanua Ionatana Umu-Cais. The Huskies’ coaching staff must have memorized phonetics just to announce his debut tackle. Meanwhile, TI is learning that brute force only gets you so far—sometimes you need to outrun the announcer’s tongue. Picture a linebacker chasing down a reporter mid-press conference just to teach them how to spell “Umu-Cais.” Now that’s a highlight reel waiting to happen.
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