Progrums

Battle of the Irish and Ducks for Chicago’s Beast

Notre Dame’s 2027 recruiting haul already shines, but prized defensive tackle Brayden Parks of Brother Rice High is still up for grabs. Standing 6-3 and weighing 305 pounds, Parks has long been a top target for the Fighting Irish, thanks in part to his ties to Notre Dame legend Chris Zorich and cousin Tony Jones Jr. Yet the latest intel suggests Oregon holds the edge in his decision. Though Parks remains high on South Bend, the Ducks’ relentless pursuit and his growing excitement for Eugene have put Notre Dame on the back foot. Still, the Irish hope family legacy and proximity to Chicago might sway the Chicago-area star before he signs his national letter of intent.

If college recruiting were a reality TV show, you’d have to hand props to Oregon for pulling off the most dramatic season twist of 2027. Notre Dame walked into this competition confident—family ties, a high-octane defensive line already in place, and all—but now find themselves clutching their lucky Shamrock pendants, praying those good vibes yank Brayden back from the Ducks’ quack attack. Meanwhile, Oregon’s coaching staff just can’t stop whispering sweet quacks in his ear. Hell, at this point you’d swear Dan Lanning is hiding a pair of ducks under his suit while bribes of gourmet kombucha flow freely. Will the Irish rely solely on geography like Homer Simpson relying on a donut? Stay tuned—this recruitment drama has more twists than a wet noodle.