In a bold new strategy straight out of the Moneyball playbook (minus the baseball), Virginia Tech has decided the secret to landing an experienced head coach is less strategy and more straight-up cash. According to ESPN insider Pete Thamel, the Hokies plan to tack an eye-popping $50 million onto their athletic budget and call it…

Fresh off their first win of the season, Virginia Tech players are strutting into Saturday’s showdown clutching that milestone victory like a golden ticket. Having survived decades of soul-crushing defeats, they’re treating last week’s W as if it cured all their historical sins. Undeterred by the fact that oddsmakers have them listed as double-digit underdogs,…

The Hokies celebrated their latest win by turning Lane Stadium into the world’s most aggressive classroom. As Wofford futilely chased shadows, Virginia Tech’s coaching staff whipped out clipboards and started assigning PFF grades to every snap, tackle, and questionable high-five. Did you run a clean route or look like you tripped over your own ego?…

In a bold display of desperation disguised as innovation, Virginia Tech’s athletic department has reportedly added Bob Chesney to its shortlist, largely because Google listed him right above that guy who sells hot dogs outside Lane Stadium. Insiders say the James Madison coach’s stellar record of winning toilets as prizes and teaching squirrels to call…

In a shocking turn of events that had fans checking to see if their TVs were on fast-forward, Philip Montgomery’s debut as Virginia Tech’s interim head coach ended in a 38-6 thrashing of Wofford—because apparently the Hokies decided mercy was overrated. After a season of glorious defeat, the team finally remembered how to play football,…

Philip Montgomery swaggered to the podium like a guy who’d just discovered free food in the break room, beaming after his Hokies obliterated Wofford 38-6. He kicked off by thanking the ball for not deflating itself, then confessed he spent halftime Googling “Where exactly is Wofford, again?” before deciding it definitely wasn’t in the Pac-12.…

After giving Brent Pry the heave-ho, the Hokies stumbled onto a radical new strategy: actually score more points than the other team. That nugget of wisdom led to a gleeful 38-6 demolition of Wofford, a squad so bewildered it considered filing a missing-person report on its own offense. Fans, long conditioned to rhythmic sighs and…

Virginia Tech fans erupted in cautious jubilation as the Hokies notched their first W of 2025, annihilating FCS side Wofford 38-6 in what experts are already calling the “Friendly Fire Cup.” The offense showered the scoreboard with more points than a birthday piñata, while Wofford’s defense played an impressive game of hide-and-seek they didn’t know…

In a bold display of gridiron generosity, Virginia Tech has graciously invited Wofford to its Lane Stadium pinata party, where every offensive line is a potential target. Fans can expect real-time thrills as Hokie defenders pluck tackles like low-hanging fruit, while the Wofford offense searches desperately for the ball—rumor has it they misplaced it in…

Interim head coach Philip Montgomery strode into his first game like a zookeeper tasked with taming a herd of overenthusiastic marshmallows—otherwise known as the Hokies’ defense. After generously gifting opponents 113 points in three matchups (because who doesn’t love unruly scoring parties?), Montgomery’s top priority is convincing his squad that, yes, tackling is a thing…